Ben’s Story

As told by wife Clare and mother Sue from Yass.

Ben was 37 when he was diagnosed with colorectal (colon) cancer. And 39 when he died, April 2024. 

He had been digestively unwell for some time but the doctors he saw thought that he had IBS or celiac or issues with his diet. He was on the waitlist for a colonoscopy but because of COVID and his age, he kept getting bumped. He was deemed too young to have anything major wrong with him, such as bowel cancer. It felt to the family that the health system let Ben down.  

It was January 2022 when Ben was diagnosed with cancer. He had 2 surgeries and chemo. He had all his treatment in Canberra which was 130km round trip. He is very sick throughout the treatment, with infections. The cancer had spread to his liver and lungs. He had liver surgery in October 2022, but to have the surgery, Ben had to stop the chemo, and the cancer grew again pretty quickly. 

Over the course of Ben’s treatment, he traveled to Canberra every 2 weeks – either to see a specialist, for chemo, for radiation, or for tests. Traveling 90 minutes there and back home again when not well didn’t help Ben, especially sitting with his type of cancer. In total, Ben and his family traveled 17,000kms for his cancer. It was too hard to use community transport, as the length of his chemo sessions varied, and Ben didn’t want to wait around – he just wanted to get home. 

Especially with young kids at home – Ben and Clare’s 2 kids were under 10 years at the time. They decided early on how much they were going to tell their kids – they didn’t want anyone outside of the family to know more about Ben’s health situation than the kids. At one stage the kids were given felt hearts with the message that when you miss daddy, you just hold the heart and give it a little rub. 

Can Assist provided financial help to Ben and his family. Ben’s wife Clare thought at first that they wouldn’t need assistance as she thought that Medicare would cover all the medical bills. And there were some big bills with the scans and testing – scans needed to determine what treatment to have but the costs are not covered by medical insurance or Medicare. And Clare felt that she was at the pharmacy every second day – Can Assist assisted with some of Ben’s medical and pharmaceutical bills. 

Since Ben’s death, his mum Sue has become a part of Can Assist, so she can assist others in Yass with the effects of cancer on the family. Sue did a cycling challenge in June 2024 to raise money for Can Assist where she rode 300 kms over the month – June as it was Bowel Cancer Awareness Month, 300 kms as it was like traveling to and from Canberra, and cycling because Ben loved cycling as a kid.